Mon...Tuesday...Oh jeez - WEDNESDAY FREAKING RECAP. Queen of Hearts. SPOILERS (that are probably not spoilers anymore because you've seen it)

WHO did we meet: The Queen of Hearts! Not so much a 'meet' as a confirm-and-reveal, but there it is.

WHAT did we learn: How Cora and Hook met! Through Regina. Through Belle. Who he was looking for as a way of finding a weapon to kill Rumpelstiltskin...which he learned about, how? Also portals! Portals have now been used successfully travel to and from Storybrooke/Enchanted Forest. And we know that there's an Enchanted Forest to return TO. There is a land where magic is in all things and follows predictable rules. That's got to appeal to someone.

WHEN and WHERE do the actions take place: Present Day Storybrook, Pre-Dark Curse Enchanted Forest, Pre-DC Wonderland, Present Day Enchanted Forest.

WHY does this matter: ...the compass? It was the goal of like a 5 episode arc. I would think  it'd have more of a purpose than hang the eff on and jump into the water. Also, apparently it's not necessary to steer a pirate ship. Through realms. That were opened  by an INSTANTLY RESUSCITATED BEAN FROM CONVENIENTLY DRILLED MAGIC WATER. /rant

Remaining Problems: Oh poor Regina. Someone in the royal family needs to teach Henry some courtly manners - INVITE THE WOMAN TO DINNER. She went against all sense and at the very least her own interests and did (what appeared to be) a Very Risky Thing all because Henry tossed a schmaltzy line at her. Perhaps Regina needs more time on the couch with Archie. Oh and Hook and Cora are in Storybrooke. ISSUES.

Best Line:Yeah, I came up empty on this one. Suggestions?

Wait, What?: How does Regina know who Hook is, where he's from, and what he's after? And Regina knows how to kill Rumpelstiltskin?? And Regina has Jefferson's Hat??? When did Regina become the one holding all the magical cards? And when did Regina even have the chance to tell Rumpel that Cora was dead? (Dammit I'm going to have to go back and watch Season 1...)

Hey remember that guy...?: August? Neil? Jefferson? King George? Dr. Whale? Bueller?

Are you still here?: Aurora and Mulan. And while we're at it - Henry. You can all just...go.

Look who got a bigger budget!: Wardrobe! Specifically Regina's. But yikes, that high-collared black number when she was saying goodbye to Cora was a tad much. Elton John is going to be upset when he finds out you borrowed his formal cape without asking....and without borrowing the matching boots and piano.

Don't Trust: The Blue Fairy. I'm going to keep beating the drum on this shady bitch. We haven't seen her in awhile. And she is going to be fit to be tied when she finds out that the magic diamond crystals are gone.

Really OUAT?: Cora's just going to put a dome (Simpsons did it) over a whole swath of Enchanted Forest protecting it from the Dark Curse with a simple 'You Shall Not Pass' with her staff? Maybe Rumpel should be worried.

Strange Coincidence: In the SAME episode we see two unsuccessful attempts to steal a heart. Cora's heart can't be stolen/ripped (at least not by usual means), and neither can Emma's.

Educated Guesses: We're going to have to figure out where Cora's horcrux heart is to defeat her. This is problematic by itself, compounded by the fact that we know she's jumped through at LEAST three realms now.

Crackpot Theories: It's hard to form any around this episode. A lot of loose-ish ends got tied up for Winter Break. There's no reason for the Charming-Snow-Swan family to even get involved in this impending battle. Hook is after Rumpel and Cora is after (?) Regina. They could, theoretically, ditch Storybrooke for the Enchanted Forest. They won't, of course...and I'm sure at some point in 2013 they'll wonder why they didn't bail when they had the chance.